Poems by Bac-Win

I’ve Loved My Times Alone

I've walked winter beaches quite
content
Felt the clinging mist upon the
winter's dunes
Naked piers by some storm
washed wrenched
Pilings leaning out to meet me
then pulling back again.
I've loved the solemn beach, the
time I've spent
Watching visions appear then
disappear within my solitude.
And I have loved my times alone.
I've climbed mountain balds and
sat
Watching stars that winked at me
then hid
Behind some night cloud passing.
Evenings that spat snowflake
falling fantasies.
Watched a sunlight bath
Ignite a golden tree, then spread
itself
On cloud tops, gold white below
In celestial revelry.
And I have loved
In mountain meadow mornings of
my mind.
And I have loved my times alone.
I've floated in the current of a
night shorn waterway
Guided by the shore lights a
thousand miles away
And listen to the sounds of
humanity at bay
Felt the cold wind cut my face
Imprint its rippled ribs upon the
water's edge
And clean white sand
Felt the taught sail jerk, then
plunge ahead
Tiller pressed against my hand
Felt my eyes leap out to find
some shape;
Some sight of land.
And I have loved my times alone.
I've sat in tall oak trees at dawn
Looking cross some quiet field
Watching the horizon glow, and
Morning shadows ebb and flow
Seeking antlered bucks among
the brush.
And heard the lonely bellowed
call
Seen the primal strength and
form just out of range
Seen the snorting nostrils flaring
steam
Gather up nocturnal harems,
alone, then disappear
I have understood his solitude
And I have loved my times alone
Touching parts of life that some
men never know
The smell of rain on fresh turned
sod and country roads
That cuts the dust; Makes Tin
roofs sing
Swishing pine trees gossiping
Whispering their secrets to and
fro
Dancing with the winds that blow
And so--I know
That somewhere between alone
and loneliness is you
And for all the times I've spent
alone.
The only difference in the two.
Is your loving smile upon the
emptiness.
In knowing you.
I have someone
I can miss.

Bac-Win

My mortal breath has brought me to this moment
This day, This time.
I cannot tell you why, for I do not know.
There have been many times it could have gone and not returned again.
It sputtered faltered and then again took up the path.
But I want nothing here alone.
Sometimes that breath returned seems cruel.
For nothing comes of it.
My broken heart lies helpless.
Parts of it already dead for they could not stand the emptiness
The yearning, the longing, the wanting something indefinable.
Why the rest of it continues on I do not know.
My soul lies wounded panting huddled in some corner
Waiting for the worms which nibble at its deflated tresses
Cold and starving
Pushed from out the light into the darkness of some damp stone crypt.
Dripping passion into the dark abyss.
Where no man nor even god can see.
For I put all I am into my loving until there was nothing left of me.
Except this ghost with mortal breath whom I do not know.
Cannot know.
Brought me to this moment passionless.
When I sought eternity.

Bac Win